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The wait continues and it seems to be the beginning of shunning

It is one week and one day after that dreaded Janaury 19th evening when my mother indicated we were not welcome to come visit her. How quickly things have moved. My last verbal contact with my sister was Thursday the 19th and with my mother it was Saturday the 21st.

I am doing amazingly well - thanks to God, our church pastors, my non JW family and friends praying for us.  Pastors from the church have contacted me, friends have called and emailed me, and my non JW family keeps checking in with me.  The loving support has been tremendous.

I have come to the realization that I am being shunned.  I cried seven days straight, with just some slight tears yesterday on day eight.  I wrote a plan for me to cope with this:

  1. Allow myself to grieve and then be done grieving.
  2. When I am done grieving (not that I will ever stop being sad about this), don't forget my family, don't lose hope for them and most importantly, pray for them everyday that they see the truth as God so graciously allowed me to see.
  3. Be thankful for the family I do have and embrace them.  My husband, son and in-laws are amazing and have given me tremendous support.  My father was never a Jehovah's Witness and although he passed away more than 12 years ago, I have his side of the family that knows what I am going through and they have been a huge support to me.
  4. Embrace and surround myself with my "new" family.  My "new" family is my church family.  We are trying to get more involved and will be meeting with one of the pastors next Wednesday for some encouragement.  Additionally, we believe it was no coincidence that my husband bought a house next to a pastor who is one of the pastors at the church we go to now.  Him and his wife have been amazing and so loving to us.

For JW's who may be going through a similar experience, my heart goes out to you.  As I mentioned I have been blessed with the loving support of many.  Not all Jehovah's Witnesses who want out have this same type of support system that I have.  Here's why:

  1. As a Jehovah's Witness you are told not to make "worldly" (anyone not a JW) friends.  Your only friends are your JW friends. 
  2. If you have been born and raised in the religion, chances are your entire family and extended family are JW's. 
  3. You are never allowed to go to another church and told they are all false religion.  Simply stepping foot into them is a sin.  Attending one is also considered apostasy (a sin for which you are doomed to eternal destruction).

If you are too scared to go seek help from another church and you have no one to turn to for help, you feel stuck.  The fear and mind control used by cults is very powerful.

So, what can someone do in this circumstance?

  1. Pray to God for help.  Ask him to show you the truth and provide you with guidance and direction.
  2. Don't be scared to do more research or to get assistance from a church.  The Watchtower Bible and Tract Society has engrained in its followers that any information out there that is not written by them is apostate.  I have had this challenge with my mother thinking this.
  3. Seek out a conservative non-denominational bible church in your area.  One that is not afraid to take a stand that salvation is through Jesus Christ and that as Christians we should try to live our lives by the bible.  Search the internet and call around to find one. 
  4. If you are being shunned by your family and friends, forgive them.  Pray to God about it.  I am not mad at my family, as I know they have been brainwashed.
  5. If you are really depressed about this, don't be afraid to seek professional help. 
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